Think Too Much

Posted: 31.10.06 in Blogging

Even a friend noticed that I think too much. I have been distracted lately.

Am I reaching a new stage of maturity? It feels like I’m having a mid-life crisis already. Things that were a priority before don’t seem as important now. There seems to be much more to think about now than there has been before: there are too many distractions.

Outside of my small world there are so many problems in the world. HIV/AIDS is one I talk about most, but there are many others. Sometimes I feel that there are more important things I should be doing with my time. In fact I’m starting to think that mathematicians and statisticians are probably not the most important people that the world needs right now.

And there are some things closer to home that seem to warrant more attention than my studies. What the heck is up? It never used to be so much of a trouble to get work done – sure I always left it later than most, but when it came to it, I met it with enthusiasm.

Anyone with any answers?

  1. helen says:

    It’s called growing up Steve,

  2. wl says:

    I have that feeling too. Kind of lost. I don’t know. I guess in my case, it’s that there’s no real motivation there. Here’s the theory I grew up with: in this world, if you want to be happy and make your family happy, and live a decent life, you have to have a good job and you’d better have a good educational background. A good job backed by good education-that’s what I always use to motivate myself. But the thing is, it doesn’t work well in everyday life. It may work a few days after some big moments. But normally when I sit in front of a book full of difficult texts and questions, the only two things that can keep me there are responsibility and curiosity. As to the ‘responsibility’, if I’m going to the lectures or seminars, I should be well-prepared, otherwise no point. As to ‘curiosity’, I really want to find the logic in the texts which I can’t get easily. I didn’t mention ‘interest’, for unfortunately I am still not one of these lucky ones who know what they really want. But I do believe the responsibility and curiosity will assist me find it. Hey, don’t bother yourself with these thoughts any more. Just keep on with things you care, and believe in yourself that you will find your way! I know sometimes words are rubbish, but what if they can help, even if a little. 🙂

  3. Steve says:

    Thanks Helen: I suppose it is a part of growing up in a sense. Everyone comes to a point when they question what they are doing.

    I also agree with wl: if I ammotivated to do something, I will succeed. I am motivated by two things: ‘curiosity’ – much like wl; and praise. If someone acknowledges the work and effort I have done, I feel much better about myself. The problem is that I don’t feel I am getting personal praise for the work I do. This problem is compounded by the fact that I am not doing significantly better than others – which is something that I have been conditioned to feel good about, having done so during Primary and Secondary school. This is a trait I shall have to shake off if I am to feel good about my achievements in the future. I should accept that if I have made the best effort to do something, I should be satisfied with this, even if I have not managed to be ‘the best’.

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